You can find the word, “upeksanam” in the yoga sutras of Patajanali. It is cited in book one, sutra 33. These are my two favorite translations:

“The mind becomes clear and serene when the qualities of the heart are cultivated: friendliness toward the joyful, compassion toward the suffering, happiness toward the pure, and impartiality toward the impure.” Shearer

“Calmness arises from friendship, empathy, delight and equality towards others.” Remski

Alistair Shearer’s translation of upeksanam is “impartiality”; it’s one of the most common definitions, along with “disregard”, “neutrality” and “indifference”.
Matthew Remski takes a radical turn away from the conventional and chooses, “equality”.

Upeksanam has always been a hard term for me. I had a teacher who used to talk about it as eagle vision. It is often a word/tool invoked regarding relating to a difficult person, or even an adversary. I like the eagle vision association because it implies taking a wide view, what is problematic for me is that it also implies distance. I am much more interested in relating, getting up close and dirty, I like the fight and tough conversations. But there are times when you come across someone who operates so differently then you do, people who don’t want the same kind of connection and the fight is bitter, totally unproductive or not reciprocated. I have encountered these kinds of circumstances lately and watched others in the same place and the word “upeksanam” keeps unexpectedly rising up in me. With it comes a vision of my hands holding tight fists, then releasing and floating.

I prefer Remski’s offering of equality, because one doesn’t have to be wrong and the other right AND I don’t have to disregard or disengage. Multiple ways of being exist, you can let go of your need to turn someone your way and allow everyone to float out there in the same sky, field, ocean of equality. Remski uses the word equality because it “does not imply withdrawal from, discernment, or protective action.” He expounds on this, “Withdrawing from the other is no longer a viable option for our species.” I am not sure exactly what he is getting at, perhaps that as we find ourselves in environmental crisis, on an increasingly crowded planet, with so many new avenues for connection withdrawal is not the answer, instead we must dig our heals in and find a way to create a healthy environment and real peace amongst us. If we adopted the ethic of equality on the micro could that move us towards healing and peace? If we let our hands loosen would we find ourselves more connected?